finding the beauty in life

Tuesday, December 22, 2015


It's the first day of Winter, Goood Ol' December 22nd and, theres not a snowflake in sight in Southern Ontario. Instead the weather feels like a cool fall day and the only reflection of the winter weather to come, is my poor cracked, dry and desparate lips.
Lately I have been using SoftLips Luxe  5-in-1 Lip Care on my lips on days when, I am wearing no other lip products and underneath lipstick and lip liners that tend to dry out my lips. First, lets talk packaging, I really like that it has a twist up applicator reminiscent of a lipstick tube because, I am not a fan of lip products specifically balms, that require you to stick your finger into a jar.
 This product promises to:


As someone who has really dry lips during the winter, I have to say that Softlips Luxe delivers on all 5 benefits. Since using this product my lips have felt a lot softer, smoother, and more hydrated then ever before. It also helps that when I wear it under lipsticks that do dry out my lips, my lips feel really great, and my lipstick seems to be lasting a lot longer. Available in Sily Shea and Creamy Coconut which, I have been using religously this product retails for $4.67 exclusively at Wal- Mart, and I promise you will not be disappointed with this purchase.

Softlips Canada is giving away this $50 prizepack all you have to do is:
1. Like Softlips Canada on Facebook.
2. Like my post of the giveaway priza pack on my Instagram page
GIVEAWAY open to CANADIAN resident only.


Monday, October 26, 2015


I never thought that I would be the kind of person to say "(insert year here) was my year", but as I sit here and think back, "2009 was definitely my year".  There was so much peace, strength, and ambition in that year for me. In 2009 I was a 19 year old who was extremely driven to succeed in the world, there was abosultely nothing in my mind that I could not do, if i put my mind to it. The world was my oyster and boy did I take advantage of it. I applied to my "dream" university and got in, I worked my butt off, at a job that I loved and I spent time with the most amazing girlfriends that a girl could ask for. If I could sum up what I was feeling during this time period it was a feeling of, " I CAN", it didnt matter what obstacles I faced, 2009 was the year that I CAN NOT was not in my vocabulary, and I CAN ruled my world.  Anxiety has defnitely lead me to be more of an I CAN NOT person, every goal, every ambition, and every thought is plagued with I CAN NOT. I must say I miss the peace of I CAN, there is something so peaceful about believing in yourself no matter what, while the torment of I CAN NOT seems to be a plague, a black cloud that seems to follow you no matter what you do. As the date of my appointment at a specialized anxiety clinic fastly approaches, my hope is that the peace, ambition, and strength of I CAN, will once again be a significant part of my life. 


Friday, October 16, 2015


It's very rare that I find myself completely speechless ( something that many of my family members will atest to) but, that's exactly what happened when I watched the documentary Searching for the Sugar Man. This documentary tells the story of Sixto Roddriguez an amazingly talented singer and writer who, in the 1970s recorded two albums. Though he had the support of major record producers, men who had called him the second coming of Bob Dylan, Rodriguez never gained fame in North America. While Rodriguez gave up his ambitions for fame, and retired into a relatively normal life in Michigan, he was becoming increasingly more popular in South Africa, something which was completely unknown to him for twenty plus years. Searching for the Sugar Man tells the amazing story of the search for a South African cultural icon, Rogdriguez, the Sugar Man. 

The film is available on Netflix and iTunes! I highly reccomend you watch this amazing story.


Tuesday, October 6, 2015


Soooo, I have been really trying to experiment more with makeup, and share my looks here on my blog. I am in no way a professional but, when I do an okay job for an amateur, I be feeling myself extra hard. I've had this revlon, bold, 
dark purple lipstick in Va Va Violet for some time,so I thought I'd give it a try! Here's my vampy look with the lipstick being the star of the show.

 Comment below if you like the look or have any tips for me!



Monday, October 5, 2015


There are two things I absolutely love about fall! 1. Is being able to get salted caramel hot chocolate at Starbucks and 2. Is getting a lot of wear out of my Converse. What I love a lot about converse is that I can wear them with anything ...leggings, jeans, and even a dress ( that one trick day In fall when it was hot). I will say that if your doing a lot of walking then you should probably get some kind of comfy insole for these shoes but for hanging out with friends or going out to run some quick errands I absolutely love how these shoes can be paired with anything. 
Comment below and let me know how you rock your converse ;) 



Friday, September 25, 2015


Wednesday officially marked the first day of fall but, lets face it when Starbucks released everything pumpkin spice at the beginning of September it was a sign of the uggs and plaid shirts that would soon be seen everywhere. Although I do love me some of starbucks' fall drinks ( hello salted caramel hot chocolate, it was love at first sip) I have so say farewell to one of my favourite summer purchases. 

I shopped at J. Crew for the first time this summer and though I didn't buy any clothing I did fall in love with these amazing sunglasses. I love the retro feel of the glasses and the classic shape of them which, I personally feel will never go out of style. The glasses were $27 and I have gotten so much wear out of them. I've never really been a sunglasses person so imagine my surprise when i found a pair that were not only super comfortable and fashionable but also ones that I actually wanted to wear. 

I definitely think that everyone should checkout J.Crew for sunglasses. Just when you think all signs of summer are gone you may end up finding a pair that look amazing year round. Farewell summer me and my J.Crew glasses will see you next year.


Tuesday, September 22, 2015


In a world where the hottest beauty products rarely go on sale ( unless we're talking drugstore ) you learn to love places like Sephora and Shoppers Drug Mart, granted you may not get your favorite brands at a discount but, in steps the point systems and the makeup world seems a little brighter. There's only one problem with that...what store to choose. Here's a few tips to help you make your choice! 

* Added bonus of shopping both drug store and high end ! 
 *Optimum points collected turn into cash, and can be used to purchase anything in the store ( taxes must be paid when using optimum points) 
*Does not include a huge selection of brands in the beauty boutique 

*Amazing selection of brands to choose from 
*Hello Colour IQ ( try this at least once) 
*Sephora Beauty Insider Points - each dollar turns into a point which allows you to get samples at time of purchase starting at 100 points - that's a $100 purchase 
*Points don't turn into cash and a limited selection of samples 

While both stores are pretty awesome  and offer amazing perks I personally love me some shoppers. I like that my points can be turned into cash for anything in store, even if I have to pay the taxes. The added bonus to shop drug store brands ( despite limited brown girl shades - get it together shoppers- ) just makes shoppers a little more convenient points and shopping wise.


Friday, September 11, 2015


I have always been incredibly open on this blog, especially when it comes to my mental health struggle. In the past I have talked about my mental health but, I have never adressed what steps I'm taking to improve my struggle. Unfortunately, as much as I realized I needed to get help I have always either a. given up ( on counselling or cbt) or b. stopped taking medication prescribed to me by physicians. I don't know if turning twenty five had anything to do with it, or the current personal struggles in my life, but I am no longer willing to accept the mediocre. On a journey to better my mental health I have taken a medical leave from work and am currently waiting to get back into a CBT program. The reason I am sharing this is because I know that more often then not it becomes extremely difficult when your going through mental health struggles and you just want to give up. But it is important to know and recognize how much strength it takes to even admit to yourself that you have a probem, and to seek help for it. It is such a beautiful moment when you realize that you need help and you take the steps to get it. For me I have realized that there are so many beautiful reasons to be happy, and I can no longer let my mental health hold me back from that happiness.

- Kesha xo


Wednesday, March 25, 2015


Harlequin, let's be honest when you think about that word you think about outlandish and often bizarre romances with extremely handsome men and women who are 

A. too beautiful 
B. about to go Cinderella on your ass half way through the book. 

Despite the often unrealistic qualities of these books I have to say harlequin novels are seriously one of my guilty pleasures. Don't ask me why I like these books so much,  and if you ask me how many I've read I will flat out lie, for fear that my admission would embarrass me for life, death of my reputation and all that . However, if your looking for a quick read where there's always a happy ending check out harlequin novels, although bizarre you won't be disappointed.


Thursday, March 12, 2015


I often find it extremely hard to relax, anxiety overwhelms me and I start to panic with a million thoughts going through my head. So when I start feeling anxious I do two things. First, I light a Yankee Lavender candle, a comfort for me because it reminds me of my grandmother. The second thing I do is think of all the good times with my grandma and how much she understood and loved me. Whenever I can't relax these are the two steps that remind me I am loved, and that I can make it through any struggle, even if its just a small scale anxiety attack.


Monday, March 9, 2015


Before, I start this post let me say that I am completely biased when it comes to Rimmel becuase I have a serious bone to pick with them. Can someone please tell me why they have such a poor shade range when it comes to their foundations!! I own and love the Rimmel Stay Matte Primer but, for the life of me I do not understand why they don't any foundation shades for women of a darker complexion. Rimmel if you ever read this please step up your game, the world is a rainbow and right now your rainbow isnt as appealing as it should be.

Okay, so rant aside I have to say that this Rimmel Retro Glam Mascara is quite possibly the worst mascara I have ever tried! Your eye lashes are clumpy and just plain uncomfortable with this stuff on. The formula for me personally was just dry and gumpy ( i got a real way with words). The one saving grace for this product was that it only cost me $5 because it was on sale. Stay clear of this mascara ladies and gents, there is absolutely nothing glam about it.


Tuesday, March 3, 2015


Okay, so in the normal world I would never splurge on a $57 makeup palette but....someone out there is rewarding me for my occasional awesomeness because, I had the opportunity to get a LancĂ´me palette *swoon*. I got the 310 Luminous Violet palette and let me tell you this baby goes on like butter! Im no makeup artist but I had to take the opportunity to try this bad boy out! because let's face it who doesn't love butter ? There was a little fall out because the shadows were extremely soft but all in all this was a great palette. I even attempted to do a little makeup look! full posing included. 



Monday, March 2, 2015


Lately, despite my great efforts I've been finding myself less and less motivated. I pretty much spend a great deal of time sleeping and just feeling down in general. The other day when I was feeling a little more happy and motivated i wrote the above words to remember that there will always be good times and bad times in this life. My greatest struggle however will be focusing on the good times instead of dwelling on the bad. 


Thursday, February 26, 2015


Aveeno has always been a part of my life, from the time my mom dragged me kicking in screaming into an oatmeal bath to soothe my eczema, I have always had a relationship with the brand. So years later when my mom brought me the Aveeno Clear Complexion Cleansing Bar instead of screaming or kicking I dove right in. The grown up me new a good thing when I saw it, and I love using  this cleansing bar especially after a day with a full face of makeup it just leaves me skin feeling extremely clean and comfortable. This product also sticks true to what I know about Aveeno! This brand is amazing for sensitive skin and no matter how many products I use I always come back to this. I guess the child in me remembered that after the kicking and screaming Aveeno always took away all the uncomfortable feeling of being a child with eczema and it's amazing it can still do the same for me as an adult.    


Wednesday, February 25, 2015


There aren't many words that I can use to describe the following post. But the above picture says it all, the things in this photo are all  I have left of my dad. There are few memories but, the roses, the music notes, and the pictures are things that I will cherish for the rest of my life. 
Watch THIS video to hear my everyday thoughts and experiences of growing up without my dad playing a major role in my life.


Tuesday, February 24, 2015


Ok, so Urban Outfitters has definitely been taking a page out of the Sephora marketing book because a few months back they totally got me at a little set up right before I cashed out! Enter the Mario Badescu facial spray which had been on a wish list of mine! I know a lot of people use this as a refresher later in the day but, I actually use this product twice a day ,immediately after I apply my makeup and again after I apply my toner before bed. I really love the fresh look it gives my face when I apply it after my makeup and when I apply after toner. This is just a really great product the rose water and aloe Vera really makes your skin look and feel different I will definitely be trying more from Mario Badescu.


Monday, February 23, 2015


For so many years I really didn't understand or appreciate the sacrifices my mom has made for me over the years. I waited for her to apologize to me for 25 years and once it happened I realized that it really didn't matter, she did the best she could in an unbelievably difficult situation and for her strength and support I am forever grateful. 
Thank You MOM! The smile on my face in the above picture is a smile that you have brought to my face so many times over the last 25 years.


Thursday, February 12, 2015


In honour of Valentine's Day I thought I'd share some of my favourite red beauty products. 

1. NYX lipstick in SNOW WHITE
2. REVLON nail polish cover stay gel envy in QUEEN OF HEARTS 
3. MILANI lipstick in BEST RED 
4. FIRST AID BEAUTY skin rescue PURIFYING MASK with red clay 
5. ESSENCE lip liner in RED BLUSH 


Monday, February 9, 2015


I have to admit that I have always though that Clinique was a brand which was targeted towards a more mature woman. I had this opinion for two reasons, first there isn't a childhood memory of my paternal grandmother where Clinique is not involved. Every Time I spent time with her even to this day I see some kind of Clinique product. That little green packaging might aswell have been a leprechaun stalking me when I spent time with her as a child. The second reason is that the department store that sells Clinique where I live seems to more geared to a mature clientele. To me this store has always been a place where older generations shop and this shows in their marketing and their employees.

Luckily for me though I purchased a gift for a friend at the Clinique counter and got a free gift which included to products I think will always be staples in my beauty routine! The High Impact mascara is amazing. What I love the most about it is it lengthens and gives you full lashes without having that heavy uncomfortable feeling that some mascaras leave you with.

 The second product is the Clinique Moisture Surge Gel. Girlfriends, if your skin is suffering from this dry winter weather pick this stuff up because it is above and beyond amazing! I have literally been rationing this stuff but, I know that as soon as my sample is done I will be rushing out to buy the full size!

If your interesting in trying some Clinique products I definitely suggest you try out those two products from Clinique. Also please leave a comment below telling me your favourite Clinique products you think I should try. 

Friday, February 6, 2015


Like a burger and fries, milk and cookies, Simon and garfunkal, the perfect combo can make a huge difference and though one may not think so the importance of the perfect combo in the world of beauty can mean everything! So I wanted to share my favourite beauty combos!    

Because my skin is extremely oily and I also suffer from hyper pigmentation and acne scaring studio fix fluid has always been my foundation of choice. But for a while there I was looking for an alternative because I every time  I applied it with a brush my skin felt like had 50 pounds of make on it! Enter the fabulous beauty blender which because you use it when damp in my personal opinion it cuts down the super cakey feeling of the studio fix fluid. This combination gives me flawless skin without feeling like my face has icing on it. 

I finally found the perfect nude lip with a hint of pink combo. MAC's Spice lip liner ( shot out to Kylie Jenner for making chicks scramble for this) and Half an' Half lipstick. I love this combo on my lips especially since it's not to brown or no to pink, it's just right.  


All hail the amazing real techniques multi task brush! This thing applies blush like nobody's business. Everytime time I apply it I feel as if I have the rosey cheeks of an angel. Pair that with my favourite MAC blush  and bam It adds the exact amount of colour to my cheeks to leave me feeling like a million bucks  

I love love love the black nirvana perfume by Elizabeth and James! The whole point of perfume is that when it mixes with your skin it's supposed to create a scent that's not only just the perfume but a mixture of your body's pheromones and the perfume . I have to say  each time I wear this perfume I fall in love with a little more. I don't have the white one but I have tried the two mixed together, which is how there supposed to be warn and it smells just as good as the perfumes on their own. When I wear this perfume I looooooove to smell myself. 

I have to admits that I am extremely guilty of being one of those makeup wearing people that does not wash her brushes on a regular basis. I just found that washing brushes is such a tedious experiences. That was until I bough the beauty blender cleanser. I really and truly believe that this product leaves your bridges amazing clean not to mean the fact that all you have to do is swirl the damp brush through the cleanser and it's clean, which for me is a bonus! I would most definitely recommend trying this amaze balls product you wont regret it.

I hope you've enjoyed my five favourite combos!! Leave a comment below and tell me about your favourite beauty combos 



Tuesday, February 3, 2015


Recently I decided to get creative will my makeup and I know by looking at these pictures your thinking how the hell is a smokey eye creative? Well let me tell you I am in no way shape or form a makeup artist so to me this look is like my version of michealangelos  Sistine chapel!  Two snaps for KESHA who busted out the makeup brushes before the Super Bowl so while she waited for the Katy Perry halftime show to start she could take a world of selfies :)  Any Whooo here's how I got this look! 

First I used TooFaced shadow insurance all over these bacon grease eyelids so that my shadows wouldn't crease. 


1. Applied Chocolate eyeshadow all over the lid and into the crease. blend blend blend 

2. Applied Gilded eyeshadow to the inner third of the lid and once again blend blend blend. 

3. For the grand finale I applied Noir shadow to the out V to give me that smokey look and 
once again I blended the heck out of it.  I also smudged some of this on my lower lash line.

 Clinique High Impact mascara of the lashes. Also because my eye look was so heavy I opted for my current favourite lip combo of MACs Spice lip liner and Half n' Half lipstick.   

I hope you guys enjoyed this commentary on this look and I hope to god you like it! 

Wednesday, January 28, 2015



     Look at the smile on the face in the above photo... I may seem like the average 24 year old happy and care free but, you would be surprised what I have survived. This smile belongs to a girl who once had to stay on the phone with her mother for eight hours for fear she would kill herself, this smile belongs to a girl who didn't leave her house for two months, this smile belongs to a girl with agoraphobia, anxiety, and manic depression. 

    My name is Nakesha and I am that girl. I have struggled with agoraphobia, anxiety, and manic depression since 2011. To be honest with you before my diagnosis when someone would tell me they were depressed I would automatically think " get over it", now everytime some one says that to me my heart breaks. On top of the counselling and medication, my life is a constant struggle between feeling worthless and that I deserve to die and feeling that maybe, just maybe I can beat the demons holding me. These diseases have affected me more then just mentally they have taken friendships, relationships, jobs, school and most importantly my freedom. In the last four years I have been unable to spend time away from my mother or grandfather for fear that without their presence I would harm myself. This has been my life for four years a girl who can not live without her mommy or grandpa and who hasn't spent a night away from family in four years . 

      But all that needs to change! In the year 2015 I want to be the girl who will travel to Europe with agoraphobia, anxiety, and manic depression and documents the struggles that I face on my road to regain my freedom. I want to show all the people that suffer from mental health disease that they can live a "normal" and fulfilling life. I want to show that despite the suicidal thoughts, the tears, and the loss. I am more then my diagnosis. Please help me be able to travel and at the same time raise mental health awareness and to show people that they no longer have to be ashamed. I will document my travels and struggles throughout my trip starting in Canada as I make my way to Italy and the United Kingdom.  

        In essence I am raising money to travel ! Currently I have had to quit school and forgo employment in order to be a caregiver to my grandfather who has just had surgery and is struggling with his own personal mental health issues. My current situation is extremely stressful as I am trying to overcome my own struggles and take care of myself while also trying to help someone else. Please help me to raise the funds to be able to travel so that documenting my journey will help spread mental health awareness. 

Please feel free to share my story and help me reach my goal! 

Xo Kesha 
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